Over the years I have often shared my thoughts on why I have a sexual preference for beautiful black men. It's a conversation I've had many times with my girlfriends and we've all agreed - there's something really powerful and distinct about the sexual appeal of black men. For us it was always something obvious, but also kind of subtle. The difference between how the energy from a beautiful black man lands on us versus the energy of a white, brown, or Asian guy....it's SO different.
But I've always been curious to know if that understanding is the same with how white guys view it. What do they think is behind the sort of gravitational pull that black men have with white women? So I decided to do a live event in the Queens Quarters Community and talk about it during my monthly Interracial themed chats. I asked the question, what do YOU think is behind that kind of pull that they have? And this is the list we came up with:
- Size. This one is of course important to me, as a size queen, but interestingly it is just as important to a lot of white guys. Just have a quick look at sites like Blacked and you'll quickly notice that the most popular porn videos are white women with sexy black men who are incredibly hung. Yes, it's a stereotype, but the research does show that African countries make up most of the top 10 countries with the largest average penis size. It's a common reaction for smaller white guys to be awestruck when watching a video of a woman with a super hung black guy. So much so, that they end up being completely mesmerized by interracial porn.
- A deep sexy voice. Oh my fucking gawd YES. This is SOMETHING. That smooth, low, sexy voice that so many black men have....this is it. As soon as I hear it I immediately just melt. And I think it's unique to black men. I don't think it can be replicated in white guys/Asian guys/definitely not in Indian guys.
- BDE. Big Dick Energy. It's a thing. It's subtle yet once you learn the cues, it's simple to pick up on it and many black men have it. I think that when you haven't had to worry about your size/ability your whole life, it translates into a really chill yet confident vibe.
- Confidence/Primal Energy. This word keeps coming up with so many women who enjoy sexual experiences with black men, and for good reason. There is a sort of easy confidence that they have that women really pick up on. It's not the kind of shallow confidence that guys think they have, it's a very secure confidence that comes from deep within that translates into BDE. Black men can easily take what they want (with consent of course) because they know that women want what they have. They don't need to manipulate, convince, or prove themselves - they just get what they want, much to the dismay and defeat of white men who witness this.
- Flirting/Bravado. I have been bombarded in night clubs by thirsty white/Asian guys many times. They come up on you and try to "flirt" but it comes off as really creepy and annoying - even unsafe at times - and they get angry when you try to walk away or decline their advances. I've even been physically assaulted for not wanting to let one of them touch me. It's awful to have to deal with that. But black men have never made me feel that way. They aren't pushy or inconsiderate. They can read how you are feeling and are respectful if she's not feeling it. Why the difference? Because they are not desperate. Again, that's the BDE. No need to be aggressive to get women when you have what women want. In my experience, when a woman meets a flirtatious beautiful black man, she is more receptive to him, and he's aware of that.
- Dance. Black men can dance! The way they move, the rhythm, the everything! I find it hilarious to watch white/Asian guys try to dance in a club. There is no comparison.
- Good kisser. I have yet to meet a black man who is a bad kisser - and bad kissers, as we know, are instant ladyboner-killers. How do black guys learn to kiss so well? I don't know. But all of the 'shove my mouth into yours while I dig your throat with my pointy tongue' guys out there need to take some lessons from them. Ew.
- Style. This is absolutely a thing. I've noticed that most black men put a lot of effort into their style. Whether it be coordinating the colors of their clothes/shoes or ensuring their hair cut is on point, they are always looking good.
- Body Care. I've spoken about this before but all of you white guys out there really need to take some lessons on body care from black men. They always smell good....like nice cologne or cocoa butter. Mmmm. Their skin is always soft and smooth. They invest in multipel skin care and body care products and have an established daily skin care routine and it shows. Meanwhile you go into a white guy's bathroom and you'll find a bar of Irish Spring soap and a bottle of Head and Shoulders 2 in 1 shampoo.
- Skin Contrast. There is something so beautiful about the skin contrast with black men and white women. I don't know why but it seems so sexy and many white guys love it too.
