To love your bull or not

“Each person has their own set of individual needs that need to be met on an ongoing basis and insecurities and miscommunication can lead to a breakdown and ultimately a collapse of the relationship.”


The most common question I receive from cucks who want to date me is “What kind of cuck relationship do you want?”. It seems like an obvious first question given the wide spectrum of practices and preferences within this type of relationship, and you’d think it would be easy to answer, but I’ve found my answers have changed and evolved as I’ve learned more and more about cuckolding dynamics. I’ve had to examine how I feel about various relationship compositions, roles, and expectations in order to figure out what I like and what I don’t like. Often times as with everything else in this lifestyle, I have to try something in order to see if I feel comfortable with it.

I suspect the most common cuck relationship is where the monogamous husband is sexually denied (sometimes or most of the time) while his non-monogamous wife sleeps with whoever she wants, usually strangers. The wife is not expected to develop feelings for her bulls – it’s simply a sexual experience for her. Usually the cuck is present when she is with her bulls and he may or may not be directly involved in the action in some way. While this kind of relationship is continually exciting, there are safety issues when meeting with only strangers all the time.

Another variation I’ve come across is where the wife has one bull whom she has a romantic relationship with as well as a sexual bond. She has a relationship with her cuck husband as well, but he’s there to give her emotional support, love, comfort, companionship, and financial stability. Often the cuck in this type of relationship wants the bull to live in the same house with them and the wife has the benefit of having two stable, loving, long term relationships.

As a cuckoldress, I have to decide what kind of relationship I want as well as what kind of humiliating things I want to practice on my cuck. With so many options and variations it can be a bit daunting at first to figure it all out.

I have had some experience with both types of cuck relationships and I feel comfortable with both scenarios. The first one is the easiest to maintain as you’re only dealing with a relationship dynamic between the husband and wife. The second scenario can be much more complicated. It starts to grow into a polyamorous type of relationship and with that comes all sorts of challenges. Each person has their own set of individual needs that need to be met on an ongoing basis and insecurities and miscommunication can lead to a breakdown and ultimately a collapse of the relationship. It’s not easy but if done correctly it can be very rewarding.

I get so excited when I hear about cuck couples who are succeeding and thriving with their relationship – whichever composition that might be – and I’d love to hear what has worked for you and why. Let me know! Leave a comment here or on my facebook page or twitter page. Thanks!

Venus xo

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12 Replies to “To love your bull or not”

  1. it is sometimes difficult buy best to not fall in love with your bull i try to have many rather thjen just one

  2. Dear Venus, don’t you think that when a beautiful white queen like you develops true feelings for her well hung black lover and then falls in love with him it eventually leads to breeding a black child; and what a joy it would be for a goddess like you to carry your black lover’s child. Thus making a statement to the rest of the world that a beautiful white goddess like you can only be bred by well hung real black men and the duty of the white cuck husband is to play a very submissive and supportive role in this relationship.

  3. My wife enjoyed many lovers before the “one” came along.
    I encouraged her to sleep with other men and we had many very enjoyable, kinky experiences. From her picking up strangers in bars to having a long term sexual relationship with my brother. Some times I was there and enjoyed 3-somes and more with her, other times she dated alone.
    Despite me telling her to fuck whoever she felt attracted to but walk away if she started developing more than sexual feelings. While out of town she met a guy and fell in love. I knew something wasn’t quite right because she stopped sharing her adventures with me and became distant. She wouldn’t/couldn’t end it and visited him on many occasions. When he was in town he would call/text and she would drop everything and spend the night in his hotel room. I was left explaining to the kids where their mom was! It very nearly ended our marriage.
    I’m not the jealous type and encouraged her to take lovers but this time she could not help herself and fell head over heels for this bull. It all worked out in the end but it did put an end to our games for a few years until we healed our relationship.
    Its a risk.

  4. High risk, high reward. We both prefer that deeper connection with her bull. I’ve got to believe she truly want him sexually more than me. That’s what arouses me the most. I feel if she’s just fucking random guys and not really feeling it, it feels cheap and becomes a turn off to the degree I won’t even get erect. She also isn’t into one time or random hook ups either. She’s got to crave the guy, he’s got to be able to get into her head. Yes, this is a dangerous game but cuckolding isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s also why many guys that lead their wives into this fetish you hear them refer to them as my ex. Woman are built to feel not just to fuck, be prepared for her falling a little in love, especially if he’s a really good lover. It’s a beautiful thing to witness.

  5. Thanks for your reply. When I feel like this I try to focus on my role of serving and get myself back into a specific headspace. I’ve been lucky that my Cuckoldresses so far have understood my fears and have been a good fit. But I’m single right now so it’s always a worry to find someone compatible.

  6. As a cuck who has been involved in both types of dynamics, I’m not so comfortable with my Cuckoldress loving her bull. I endure it as that is my place, but as selfish as it sounds, when it comes to love I want my Cuckoldress’s heart – the cruelty, the compassion, the kink the kindness and everything in bewtween.

    As a submissive cuck, I’ve wrestled with this for years, and sometimes have worried I’m not serving the way I should. I want my Cuckoldress to have a comfortable, familiar dynamic with her Bull. But I am scared she will love him more than me. I wish I wasn’t like that, as it’s for me to serve my Cuckoldress, but, I dunno. Maybe this makes me a bad cuck?

  7. There is a big difference between loving someone and being IN LOVE with someone.So my answer to the question of whether you can love your bull or not is yes you can love your bull but being in love with him,I don’t think would work in the relationship.
    The cuckold equation has another aspect in it other than the Cuckoldress,cuckold and bull/bulls.It’s called life.Life outside of the lifestyle.You can’t live it 24/7.In fantasy,everything always has a happy ending.
    But in reality you have to deal with day to day living,bills,possible illness or accident,employment,children?,etc.and this is where the being in love,I think,comes into play.
    The level of cuckoldry you decide on should be whatever pleases you.The male writing this has a maschochistic tendency and I think that is a cuckold trait with some traits stronger than others.
    If a person interested in cuckoldry has never read “Venus in Furs” by Leopold von Sacher-Masoch I suggest you do so.It is my favorite erotic novel.I know what it is like to feel like Severin.
    You mentioned safety and in these times you can’t be too safe but with the easy access to background check sites on the internet a person could hopefully stay away from someone that may be of questionable character.There’s always a possibility that someone could slip thru the cracks and not be the image they wanted to project.This is where your partner/cuckold comes into play.Just because he is submissive to you and your desires doesn’t mean that he wouldn’t do everything in his power to protect you because that is what being in love with you is all about.Champions appear when they are needed.Just like a hero.

  8. To date, my limited cuckolding experiences have led to a romantic relationship developing between the bull and my cuckoldress.

    As a cuck, I’d say that is my main concern going into such a dynamic…that she will develop a deeper bond with her bull rather than myself.
    Of course, sex with strangers is too risky. So I would certainly lean towards wanting a steady bull for playtime.

    As already mentioned by yourself and the previous comment, it really takes all parties being completely upfront and honest about everyone’s expectations and desires.
    Yes, loving both men in a cuckoldress’ life is possible…but I personally don’t think I would be comfortable in such an arrangement.
    Having said that, I also wish to have a bred wife. I WOULD prefer the father be involved still (I would assume financial and raising responsibilities of course), so I understand completely that there would be the basis for a romantic bond between all parties.

    Ultimately, I would not know until I experience that “3 way” romance first hand how I would adjust to it.

    Once again, great topic Miss.

  9. Very well said. I have no personal experiences but I have chatted with people who have been in both situations and I have made my conclusions. Any type of cuckolding relationship needs strong foundations otherwise it will fail at some point. I consider the romantic aspect you mentioned another (higher) part of the constant evolving a couple is going through as they meet new people and gain more experiences. I believe a person is capable of loving two people at the same time that’s why I’m sure this type of relationship can exist.

    Obviously the woman has to have a clear mind of her needs and her feelings. There are more things in a person’s life than sex and she should not forget what brought her close to her partner in the first place. Strictly romantically both the husband and wife (or the bf and gf) should know and care for each others feelings and boundaries for this to work.

    When I started to understand the importance of the cuckolding dynamics and I realized there is more than sex in a cuckolding relationship, I started to see the involvement of romance as the zenith of cuckolding if I may use this term. In a situation like this the couple stops using the bull for their fun and they open to him the door to their life. He becomes one of them and the bond only gets stronger with time. This is a fragile situation they all need to agree and respect each others feelings but it can be very rewarding for all participants. The sex will be hotter and more passionate and the mental aspect will reach new heights, not just for the cuck but also for the bull and the wife/gf.
    Finally, let’s not forget that even a romantic/polyamorous relationship can evolve and change with time like everything else in a cuckolding relationship. The participants are those who define the relationship and change it according to their needs.

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