The truth about the spade – with Drew Marston of Spades Magazine

A Queen of Spades – often heard of in the interracial cuckolding lifestyle as a woman with a sexual preference for black men. For many years this has been a fairly benign phrase that represented a woman’s adoration, respect, and sexual worship of beautiful black men.

But lately there has been chatter of it meaning something else entirely.  So here to set the record straight is Drew Marston of Spades Magazine. He will blend his personal experience as a black bull in the lifestyle for over 14 years, with a deep dive into the history of the word “spade” with the help of a friend who is an etymologist (studies the origins of words) to find out exactly where that word came from and how it has been used historically.

In addition to his 14+ years as a black bull in the lifestyle, Drew is also an entrepreneur, a published author (Spades Magazine),  creator of #RQOS (real queen of spades),  publisher of Spades Magazine, and hotwife lifestyle promoter.

Get your copy of the magazine:
Spades Magazine and Queen of Spades Confessions

Spades Magazine – Issue 1: https://gumroad.com/a/768545907/AcStl
Spades Magazine – Issue 2: https://gumroad.com/a/768545907/FGEqpQ

Other links for Drew Marston on Twitter including his personal Twitter, RQOS, and Spades Magazine

The art of the bull – a blog by Drew Marston

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[Guest Post] Managing New Relationship Energy (NRE)

When you have chemistry and connection with a new partner your brain is flooded with many hormones that make you feel exceptionally good. Oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin – the body’s love and reward molecules. Intense sexual arousal and all that increasing testosterone will drive you to want to explore and enjoy each other. This is of course more complicated in a cuckold relationship and requires tending and understanding to avoid challenges. NRE doesn’t stay only between the female and her bull. If done right it spills over to the cuckold and enhances the primary relationship. The magic of this spillover effect is what makes cuckolding so much fun. The cuck and his wife get to experience the NRE of meeting a new lover together. Having open communication and keeping the cuck part of the new relationship keeps that primary connection strong. Taking a new bull will enhance that connection.

For sex to be that next level great my wife needs chemistry and connection. Yes fucking some hot guy on vacation can be fun but building something with more depth will result in better and more adventurous sex. She very much prefers to find her own lovers. I’m not part of that process up until the point she lets me know she has found someone that she wants to pursue sexually. We openly talk about the potential bull. Safety. Discretion. Risks. Rewards. Really from her first thinking about a new lover her hormones change. She’s more in touch with her body. She has more energy. Her mood is elevated. Once we’ve chatted and she has decided to pursue her new potential the NRE starts to build. Once he’s expressed his eagerness to proceed it jumps 10 fold. My hormones have also changed at this point. I am as excited if not more excited than her. We have more sex. We fantasize more together. We play more sexual games like denial, edging, teasing, even chastity. She will always have a first and second date without sex – to see if there is chemistry. It also helps the build up for the bull. His hormones are building and making him feel lust and attraction too. Bulls consistently tell her that knowing she is married in this type of relationship is a huge boost to their drive. They want to prove their sexual prowess even more than in a monogamous relationship. It’s different. Sexy. Primal.

Planning that third date is always amazing. NRE is in full force. I make a point of always buying her new sexy lingerie. Something her bull will get to enjoy taking off of her before me. She makes a point of teasing and denying me for the week before she fucks a new lover. This builds both our testosterone levels and dramatically improves energy and desire. By the time it’s date night I’m always bursting with lust and love for my wife. Knowing she is giving me this beautiful gift of fulfilling her sexual needs while simultaneously fulfilling mine. The denial creates so much desire which in turn buffers some of the feelings of angst. Staying connected as she gets ready for her date is important. I feel and see the lust she has for this new usually younger stronger bigger man. It doesn’t make me feel at all inferior. I feel pride that I have the closeness with my wife to share something as intimate as cuckolding with her. And then she’s off to enjoy her date.

Connecting after that first sexual experience with a new bull is essential. Sharing some details of their sex brings the cuck in to the experience. My wife knows exactly how to do this that works for our dynamic. “Can you massage my thighs? He had my legs spread so wide they are really sore.” “Can you rub my feet, I had my high heels on most of the night.” “Can you gently finger my pussy and lick my clit. He fucked me so hard I’m sore but I need to cum again while I tell you where he blew his load.” Falling asleep with my arms wrapped around her, feeling her sexual satisfaction, gives such a sense of closeness and intimacy. Here the love of my life has enjoyed herself fully to then return to my arms to rest and feel safe. Why shouldn’t this amazing wife, mother, and lover enjoy all that life has to offer her.

As the relationship with her bull develops she is flooded with all those good hormones. Her sex drive is through the roof and it’s already starting on a high floor. She usually manages to get together with him 2 to 3 times a week. We are enjoying some sexual experience together almost daily. This doesn’t necessarily mean penetrative sex. Maybe I’m being denied and just getting her off. Once a solid trust is developed with her bull things move to that new level of him unloading inside of her. This throws our hormones in to overdrive. Knowing she is going to be coming home filled with cum from a new lover for the first time is a massive turn on for both of us. I’m usually walking around hard for days in anticipation. She often just tells me in a casual way because she knows it drives me crazy. “I got groceries on my way home. Oh and I’m going to let ___ cum inside of me this Friday night.” The key here is that we are staying connected in a playful way. We are enjoying the NRE together.

After she’s built a solid connection with her bull the two of them get to a point they aren’t just comfortable with being watched but actually want it. Having him over for dinner, watching their chemistry, their touching, their nuances of how they connect is highly intimate for us both. Watching them in bed is next level intimate. That primal sexual need they have to fuck each other. Watching them make each other orgasm. Every lover I’ve watched her fuck teaches me new things about my wife. I can feel their energy. Sometimes I’ll be right there joining in. Giving her that dual penetration feeling she loves. Licking her clit while he fucks her. Cleaning her up seconds after he’s filled her with his orgasm. Things that create such closeness and amazing NRE.

Cuckolding can be an incredible dynamic. Communication is paramount and requires trust, honesty, and truthful disclosure. Staying connected and making sure all three are involved, albeit in different ways, makes for a feeling of fulfillment and a hormone saturate experience. Make sure that NRE is on the table for everyone to enjoy. Otherwise jealousy and negative feelings take over. The opposite feelings of love, lust, and compersion are much better to enjoy.

About the author

Aaron & Simone are a couple who have been transitioning into a cuckold lifestyle over the last 10 years. They are in their 40’s, have a busy family and busy jobs, and busy life, and they keep this fun kink discrete. They are a physician and psychologist who love to communicate and share with others. They’ve learned a lot over the years and want to share whatever they can to help others.

New episode – ultimate cuckolding fantasies

This is it…. the most epic collection of Venus’s cuckolding fantasies. From the first date, to the proposal, to the wedding night, and the anniversaries and beyond, it’s all here. Listen to the full episode below!

 

Venus Cuckoldress – https://venuscuckoldress.com/
New Merch! – https://www.fullswapshop.com/store/venus-cuckoldress/
Submit a question for the show – https://venuscuckoldress.com/ask-venus/
Pillow Talks – https://www.crowdcast.io/venuscuckoldress
Become a Patreon supporter – https://www.patreon.com/VenusCuckoldress
Twitter – https://twitter.com/CuckoldressV
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The sexually empowered woman who wants it all

“The woman that left to go on her first date with another man never came home that night. The woman that returned resembled my wife, but will never be the same again. She has finally found the sexual being that has always been lurking just beneath the surface of her.”  — written by Ryan (Mae’s husband) on The Taboo Couple Next Door

This episode is a shining example of how this incredible relationship dynamic naturally gifts women with sexual empowerment. And with that comes an entire transformation – a transformation witnessed by her partner who stands in awe before her.

Mae shares her story about what it’s been like for her to dive into this new cuckolding relationship dynamic over the past 7 weeks with her husband of 13 years. They have started writing about their feelings and experiences on their blog The Taboo Couple Next Door.

For all of the men out there who wish their partner would learn about cuckolding relationships, this episode is a MUST LISTEN for her! Women sharing their stories and experiences with other women is the key to better understanding and acceptance of this lifestyle.

Mae’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/HotWife_Mae
Ryan’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/HWhusb_Ryan
The Taboo Couple Next Door – https://taboocouplenextdoor.wordpress.com/

New Merch! – https://www.fullswapshop.com/store/venus-cuckoldress/
Submit a question for the show – https://venuscuckoldress.com/ask-venus/
Pillow Talks – https://www.crowdcast.io/venuscuckoldress
Become a Patreon supporter – https://www.patreon.com/VenusCuckoldress
Twitter – https://twitter.com/CuckoldressV
Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/cuckoldressvenuspodcast/
YouTube – https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxpeMPYHPFIapapZDoaa03w
Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/The-Venus-Podcast-107081554590774