New episode – how do I get my wife into this?

This is where I do my best to answer the one question that I’ve been asked the most over the years….how do I get my wife into this? How do I bring it up? What’s the best approach? What if she hates the idea? There are so many things to take into consideration it’s no wonder there are so many men looking for answers. In this new episode I do my best to try to provide some answers and give some helpful advice, tips, and suggestions so that hopefully you’ll have a positive outcome. Take notes for this one!

Venus xo

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“How do I get my wife into this?”

“First of all let me say that I believe this is not going to be right for most women. It takes a certain kind of woman to love this and want it for the rest of her life and odds are that won’t be your wife so be prepared for that answer.”


It’s the million dollar question I get asked all the time and I never have a really good answer for it. But for this blog post I will try my best to address this for all of you husbands out there.

Nearly all cuckolding relationships start out with a long term relationship where the husband approaches the wife with the idea – I don’t know why but that’s the usual beginnings of it. Rarely a wife will bring it up with her husband, and even more rare is when a relationship starts out with two people who are looking for a cuckold relationship. Sometimes it happens when the wife cheats and there is a discussion to try cuckolding after that but that’s not all that common either.

So it’s usually a case where the husband is wondering how to approach his wife about it or he has and she is not on board and he wants to know how to “convince” her. No wonder I get asked about it so often.

First of all let me say that I believe this is not going to be right for most women. It takes a certain kind of woman to love this and want it for the rest of her life and odds are that won’t be your wife so be prepared for that answer. As hard as that answer is to hear, you need to ask yourself if you will be okay with that result (it’s just not for her) and then ask yourself what that ultimately means for you. Can you be happy without it or is this something that you need long term to feel fulfilled? Those are tough questions that you will need to address. Also be prepared to accept that she may be open to trying it but not likely to love it in a way that will see her participate long term.

If you are not sure how to approach her then start working on communication in your relationship. If you’re not sure how to do that then perhaps seek some help from a counselor or therapist who is open minded to these kinds of relationship dynamics. Communication skills in a relationship are fundamental and worth the time and money you invest into it and sexual compatibility is just as important as love, trust, and connection so make it a top priority.

Do not approach it like it’s something weird – talk about it as something that bonds and connects you. Make it less about the sex with others and more about the experiences you are creating together. This is a journey you would like to take with her so let her know that she is in the driver’s seat – this is about her and the love you feel when she is able to fully express her sexuality, feel desired, and be completely sexually fulfilled.

If you’ve talked to her and she wants to do some research online please tell her to be careful or at least guide her in the right direction. Mainstream cuck porn is not what she needs to watch (it’s unrealistic garbage), amature is better but still doesn’t portray what’s really happening, and Tumblr and Twitter is just going to be a sea of jerk off material for fantasy driven cucks and a bizarre collection of findom factories spewing out some false narrative about slave cuckolding – all of which will make her run in the other direction.

If she is still interested and wants to learn more, it would be wise to try and connect with other couples in your area or online who she can feel comfortable talking to. Friendships between women in this lifestyle are priceless. Do whatever you can to help her form friendships so she can feel like she can ask questions to someone other than you. Trust me she will appreciate this.

Lastly, don’t pressure her. This is what I hear a lot from husbands, that they continue to try all sorts of tactics to “convince” her. I swear if that was me I would be so annoyed. Give her some space and time and opportunities to think about what you’re proposing. It can be a big decision for her so respect that. And remember, it might just not be something she will ever want. You may have to accept that.

Venus xo

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Everything else you’ve wanted to know

“I feel like it only works when you’re in a real committed relationship with someone you love and care about. Sure you can role play cuckolding with someone who you’re not in a relationship with but there’s no meaning behind it. It’s totally not the same.”


I should have written this post a long time ago but here it is now.

Through this blog, Fetlife, and other places, I’ve been contacted by hundreds of cucks for what seems like thousands of questions and it’s nearly always the same questions repeated over and over again. I’ve spent countless hours (feels like hundreds of hours) answering these questions over and over again and quite frankly I don’t feel like fucking doing it anymore. So I’ve written down the most common questions and I will answer them here.

How did you get into cuckolding?

I’ve written on here about how I first learned about cuckolding in my post diving head first into cuckolding

What is it about cuckolding that makes you like it?

I’ve also written a bit about this before but I love it so much because it adds a whole other dimension to a relationship and the bond it creates is absolutely magical and intense. Having said that, I feel like it only works when you’re in a real committed relationship with someone you love and care about. Sure you can role play cuckolding with someone who you’re not in a relationship with but there’s no meaning behind it. It’s totally not the same.

What kinds of things do you make your cuck do?

Some of the answer to this question can be found in my post called the answer the the question all cucks as me. I find each relationship to be different but overall I do like female led relationships with a bit of cuck humiliation. I like male chastity and some aspects of sexual denial, and I obviously love my list of 17 ways to cuck your man and I would do anything from that list.

What do your friends think about you being a cuckoldress?

I’ve found this question to be a bit puzzling. I’m not sure why it keeps coming up over and over again but it seems lots of cucks are curious about this. I surround myself with very open minded friends who believe in different kinds of relationships and aren’t judgmental and they know every detail about my lifestyle. It’s not like they just found out one day and were shocked – they’ve known all along and accept me for who I am.

How public do you want your lifestyle?

I understand that there needs to be some discretion about this kind of thing and my intention is not to publicize my private life to everyone out there but I have no interest in living this lifestyle in the closet in fear of being outed. I am more open about this kind of thing than most cucks are comfortable with, I realize this.

Do you want to marry your cuck?

Yes. Definitely. I’m not interested in casually dating.

Do you want your cuck to participate sexually with you and your bull?

No. I’m greedy like that.

Are you into forced bi or ass play for your cuck?

No not interested in that at all right now.

What was the reaction of the tattoo artist when you got your queen of spades tattoo?

My tattoos were done by an artist who is the ex-boyfriend of one of my girlfriends and no, he isn’t black or white. I casually mentioned what it was about and he didn’t ask a lot of questions about it. I think cucks are hoping for a more interesting story about that. Ha!

How long ago did you get into black guys?

I’ve written a bit about why I like black guys so much, in my post called I went black, did I go back? It was only a few years ago that I really got interested in black men and now they’re all I want.

Why not just date a black guy if that’s what you like so much?

Everyone asks me this and I understand why. It would seem like it would make sense for me to gravitate towards that but really I need both cuckolding and black men in my life to be happy. Without one or the other I would feel unfulfilled and unhappy. Other reasons are that I just cannot do monogamy and I also require my boyfriend to be totally faithful to me.

Do you like BBC bareback and do you want to get pregnant?

I’m very careful with bareback being only for a very select few of my black guys, especially because I’m not on birth control. I don’t love condoms but they are very necessary in this lifestyle. I’m not planning on having any more kids either so although it’s a very hot fantasy of many cucks, it’s not likely going to happen for me.

Is there such a thing as too big?

Uh no. I haven’t met a black guy whose dick was too big for me. I’m very much a size queen. The bigger the better.

How do I find a cuckoldress?

Good luck with that. I’ve never met any other women who are like me so I have no idea where they are. I would think that Fetlife is the best place to look but that’s not all that great because you have limited women to choose from and they are usually far away.

How do I get my girlfriend to start fucking black guys?

Good luck with that too. It’s very unlikely that she happens to be one of the few who are hard wired to be a cuckoldress. She may do it for you but eventually she will lose interest if she’s not a real cuckoldress. I would suggest you introduce her to other women who are into black guys in the hopes that they become friends. That might steer her in that direction.

Well that’s all I can remember from the list right now so that should do! Hopefully that will satisfy your curiosity for a little while…