Finding love, at last

“What we have is a love for each other that would exist even if there was no cuckolding and that’s important because as many married cuckolding couples will say, it’s the foundation of an already established loving relationship that can carry the weight of a healthy cuckolding marriage.”

Venus

The search is over. I found him… the man I love and who loves me just as much, if not more. I knew this day would eventually come… at last.

The funny thing is it was actually quite unexpected. We had been friends for two years with absolutely no expectation of anything else other than that. When we were first introduced to each other (for a reason non-cuckolding related) he was attached and I was interested in someone else. It was a simple and genuine friendship up until his circumstances changed and he was single and from then on we both realized we were meant to be together. A friendship turned into love and that turned into the deepest and most meaningful kind of love.

We were introduced to each other through Michael C, the host of the Keys and Anklets Podcast, so we were both aware of the kind of lifestyle and relationship dynamic each was interested in right from the start. But other than talking about it a little the day we met, there wasn’t much discussed about it after that. We just enjoyed a friendship that was centered on the real every day aspects of our lives and that gave us the opportunity to really get to know each other in an authentic kind of way outside of this lifestyle and it’s that sequence of events that enabled us to create this kind of solid foundation to our relationship.

What we have is a love for each other that would exist even if there was no cuckolding and that’s important because as many married cuckolding couples will say, it’s the foundation of an already established loving relationship that can carry the weight of a healthy cuckolding marriage. That’s why nearly all cuckolding couples are married and they introduced cuckolding long after exchanging vows. You need that strong bond and committed connection to make it possible.

There have long been debates about whether singles in this lifestyle are better off dating a vanilla partner and once a long term relationship is established then bring it up to them and hope they take it well or risk them not taking it well and the relationship falling apart, or dating with the expectation communicated up front that you are seeking this kind of relationship and then hope that you can have some chemistry with that person. The first option is fine if you have years of your life to waste on the wrong people. The second option severely limits the people in your dating pool since the person needs to meet the criteria of matching up with you on the cuckolding spectrum so it could take quite some time to find that special person.

I came to realize that the second option was the only option that I wanted to consider. I didn’t want to invest months or years with someone who I had no idea if they would be into this part of my life or not and let’s face it, it’s something I’m not willing to live without so despite how long it was going to take I had to do it that way.

The thing I’ve figured out is the key to success though is yes you need to have a conversation right in the beginning about what it is you’re into and whether it’s something the other person is at least open minded to, but then after you find out it is…drop the subject and start dating just like any other regular relationship. Get to know them – all of them – and spend time together having normal dates and conversations on the phone and figure out if you have things in common and if there is some chemistry there. Doing all of that without including cuckolding is important. Build the relationship with the right open minded person first and then bring in the cuckolding part to an already established relationship. Focusing heavily on the cuckolding part in the getting-to-know-you part of a new relationship, although fun and exciting, has been a mistake I’ve made one too many times in the past.

For now I’m going to keep most of my relationship details private and I’m sure at some point I will share some more but I will wait until the time is right. In the coming months I will have fewer podcast episodes coming out because it will be a very busy time for me – I’m relocating across the country and will need some time to get settled into my new home.

Thank you to everyone who has supported me along this journey and to everyone who has encouraged me along the way even through the really hard times. This day has finally come.

Venus xo

P.S. I will continue to add goodies to the Venus Vault for all of my Patreon supporters!