Converting those vanilla boys

I’ve heard stories from cucks who have tried to bring their girlfriends or just women in general, into this lifestyle and they’ve all been largely unsuccessful. Many women just don’t grasp the concept or judge it harshly, or if they do try it they are likely just doing it for him and not because it’s part of who they are. For me, this lifestyle is who I am and I do it for me. That’s what I think the difference is between a successful cuck relationship and one that is not. That just my theory anyways, I know many people will disagree. 

But what would it be like for me to try to bring a “vanilla” guy into this? For a long time I just assumed it would never work so I’ve never tried. But recently I figured I might as well try it since I live in a seemingly cuckless city. So off to Tinder I went to try to seduce some vanilla boys and my oh my…was I in for a surprise! 

My first profile attempt was quite boring. I didn’t reference anything about cuckolding, just a little blurb about me being non-monogamous. I didn’t really have my hopes up that I would actually find anything on that shitty dating app. 

I matched with a guy and we started talking. He asked me what I want and I said I want you to be faithful and I want to sleep with lots of black guys and I want to be in charge in the bedroom. Surprisingly he said he liked that idea so we gave it a try. 

He lives in a different city anyways but is moving to Vancouver so for now things would be by distance. He mentioned he didn’t want to know about my experiences with black guys though and I was like whatever that’s fine for now. Then after a few weeks he asked me about the last time I fucked a black guy. I was surprised that he wanted to hear the details as I hadn’t mentioned anything about cuckolding. So I told him all about the two black guys I fucked the day before. He loved it. Then he asked if he could watch sometime. I was like WTF really??!! Hell yes! 

I was just amazed that without much influence from me, he was embracing the cuck role on his own and loving every minute of it. Could it really be this easy?

So that got me wondering and I decided to do a little more experimenting with Tinder. It was time to make another profile. 

My next profile is a veiled face pic and a pic of my queen of spades tattoo on my ankle, as well as the following text:

“I know exactly what I want and it’s probably not going to be you” #femdom #cucklife “if interested swipe up”

So nothing too scary – I don’t think anyways – but just enough to give some obvious hints as to what I’m looking for. I figured if they swipe up for a super like then I know they’ve at least read my profile and can follow instructions. 

Well it didn’t take long for my phone to light up with notifications. I couldn’t believe how many guys were genuinely interested and wanted to know more. 

Maybe this cuck wasteland I live in wasn’t actually a wasteland? Maybe my theory has been correct and they indeed are locked in the cuck closet and the closet is tinder! 

So now I have more (potential) cucks lined up than I have time to actually meet. Interesting spot to be in. Who knows if any of them will turn out to be what I want and if there is some sort of off the charts chemistry, and who knows how many of them like the idea of it but can’t do it for real, I don’t know, but it’s a start anyways. 
Venus xo

Dating as a Cuck – Part 3

Here’s part 3 of Jay’s series on what it’s like to be a cuck in the dating scene. For this one he has interviewed his friend Anne. Anne is a married QoS and cuckoldress living in the North West who’s been very gracious to discuss her lifestyle. This is what she has to say:

J: Thank you so much for doing this!

A: Of course!

J: So why don’t you say a bit about yourself. I know we’ve known each other for a while but pretend like we’ve just met haha.

A: Well I’m 37, live in the Pacific North West. I’ve been married for about ten years now to my loving husband. We currently do not have any children though we would like to have a child in the near future. Although being childless at the moment allows us to put a lot of time into our very hectic work life.

J: Awesome. So could you explain the relationship dynamic you share with your husband?

A: Well Tom and I are in a female led relationship and along with being my loving husband, he is also my cuckold. It is absolutely not your typical relationship haha.

J: Can you describe how the relationship developed?

A: Sure. So I met Tom in college. We shared the same major, had a lot of classes together. He was very cute, and I actually approached him first haha. We ended up dating for about a year or so, but I started to lose attraction to him. It was a bit of an odd feeling as I really liked him but just didn’t want to be physical with him. I didn’t know how to end it, and being a stupid 21 year old, I cheated on him with a guy on the football team. I felt terrible, but our football team was one of the best in the nation, and the football players were basically celebrities on campus. Every girl was swooning after them. They were also way more masculine than Tom, I mean you’ve seen football players, they’re quite the physical specimens haha. And a 21 year old girl with options can’t help herself around guys like that.

J: So you cheated, and then what?

A: Well we broke up. It was a mutual breakup, but I felt so bad for Tom and I decided to remain friends. In the meanwhile, I began to see guys on the football team more frequently. I was especially attracted to some of the black guys on the team. I went to an all girls catholic high school and lived in a sheltered suburb growing up, so part of it was a novelty thing. But they also had a certain confidence that I never saw in white guys, I guess you could say a swagger. I loved the way they dressed and talked and danced. And they were unbelieveable in bed, I mean life changing honestly. Smooth velvety skin and big soft lips that would completely envelope mine. And they knew exactly how to treat a woman. It was like nothing I’d ever had before. So I tended to only sleep with black guys from that point on.

J:Ahh so that’s when you got hooked! I had always wondered haha.

A: Yup! So after college I began to work at an ad agency. Quickly worked my way up the ladder, which is super tough as a woman in that industry just so you know. But I eventually became a mid-level VP. Didn’t have boyfriend but I was still in contact with Tom. One day Tom said he was looking for a new job and I told him we were hiring. So he applied, and ended up getting the job. His very first day after work he asks me on a date, and we ended up completely rekindling what we used to have. I was in love with him, but the sex was such a let down. Tom has a very thin below average penis and just could not come anywhere close to providing the same sensations as the black guys I was with. He’s also only a few inches taller than me and has a slim build, and I’m a bit of a thick gal so I need a tall muscular guy in order to really be pushed around how I like to be. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, so I asked if he would be open to swinging. He said yes, and I was thrilled because I could finally get my BBC fix haha.

J: So how do you get from that to where you are now?

A: Well Tom quickly picked up on my affinity for black guys haha. We began to experiment and he allowed me to invite one of my favorite swinging partners into our bedroom for a threesome. I believe that’s when Tom began to see his place. I mean I could tell by the look in Tom’s eyes, he was intimidated by the other guy. And I could see his stomach drop when he got a look at my partner’s massive BBC. But it was funny cause I noticed that I was actually turned on by Tom being intimidated. In the past I felt bad about telling Tom about his shortcomings, but now it seemed to be a turn on. Looking back on it, I guess it was only natural. I mean I was essentially Tom’s boss and earned way more than him, I’d strut around the office in heels and tower over him, despite me cheating on him and breaking his heart he still wanted to be friends with me. So after that night I began to start seeing other guys on my own without Tom, and that more or less was the start of our current relationship. We didn’t make some grand decision to have a female led relationship, it was just very clear to the both of us that I was in charge. By the time I decided to marry him, I knew that I needed two kinds of men in my life. A man who I loved and could control, and a man who could control me. So Tom was perfect.

J: Wow that is kind of amazing haha. So what’s the relationship like now?

A: Oh I just wanna say something because I don’t want to come off as a bitch to the Internet haha. But I don’t mean to say that Tom is less of a man! He’s very smart, loving, ambitious, and kind which is what a man should be. He’s not a good sexual partner and many women would agree with me, but he’s not less of a man.

J: Well thank you for clearing that up, so what’s the relationship like now?

A: Well we have incorporated more femdom aspects over time. He is almost always in chastity. He gets a handjob once every two months but that depends on his behavior. Sex is never an option. When we decide to have kids obviously we’ll have sex but outside of that he will forever be celibate. I know sounds harsh but Tom is accepting of this. Hmm what else, well we’ve done strapon play at times and Tom does get spanked if he screws up haha. Since we don’t have kids I normally have a bull over three times a week but sometimes I’m so busy that I’ll go a few weeks without any action except for Tom’s tongue, which thankfully is fantastic haha. Other than that, my close group of friends know everything about our relationship, but outside of that small group we appear as a typical loving couple.

J: Well that was incredible to hear! Thank you so much for your time!

Dating as a Cuck – Part 2

Here it is, the sequel to my friend Jay’s post Dating as a Cuck – Part 1. I absolutely love what he’s written, especially the last part about asking yourself that important question…. Enjoy!

Venus xo

Dating as a Cuck – Part 2

In my last post, I discussed the hard truths that one must come to terms with before beginning a relationship with a cuckoldress. If you’ve truly done the proper introspective work and decided that you are prepared, you’ve only begun half the necessary work.

In this post, I will discuss an important next step towards having a successful cuckold relationship. It is the process of dissociating yourself from your penis. This is actually something that all men should work on, but cuckolds especially.

You, the first time cuck, have gone nearly your entire life with the interests of your penis somewhere on your priority list. When you tried to sit next to that pretty girl in class, or when you caught yourself checking out your co-worker with the nice butt, or when you compulsively scrolled through dating apps, your penis was guiding your actions.

Now at a fundamental level, this is only natural. We men are hard wired to mate as often as possible with a wide range of mates. But we are no longer cavemen, and in order to be an attractive cuck you must stop thinking with your dick. One main reason, as was stated in the last post, is that as a cuck, your gf or wife simply Does. Not. Care. About your dick. When she imagines being intimate or romantic with you, your dick never enters her thoughts. She thinks about dicks that are much longer, thicker, last longer, and get harder than yours. But as a cuck your dick never enters your partner’s mind, so don’t let it enter yours either.

The other reason, is that separating yourself from your dick will actually make you a better person. There are numerous studies that demonstrate the positive effects of abstaining from masturbation. These include raised testosterone levels, increased productivity, increased mood, increased levels of motivation. These are things that any man should want! Stopping masturbation will also stop you from watching porn, which is terrible behavior for a cuck and creates an innacurate depiction of the cuckold lifestyle and women in general. So overall, you will become a better person in general.

So how do you do this? Of course its easier to talk about than actually doing it, but there are many methods and tricks to begin separating yourself from your dick. The easiest method is chastity. Talk to your partner about the need for chastity if they have not already. I recommend ordering a custom cage that will fit you properly. A proper fit should feel snug when you’re completely flaccid, you should not be able to achieve an erection of any kind while locked up.

Ceasing masturbation and porn viewing is another method. Porn often triggers masturbation, so abstaining from adult websites can immensely improve your ability to separate yourself from your dick. The last method, is pure willpower. Really think about how badly you want to be a cuck, and how great your life will be improved with a cuckoldress in it. Think about that every time you get the urge to touch yourself.

This is one of the most fundamental steps to becoming a true cuck, and there’s an easy test to give yourself to figure out if you’re closer to becoming that ideal cuck. When you think about cuckolding, do you become aroused and get the urge to touch yourself? Or do you get a rush of warm emotions, and think about sharing a special powerful bond with your loved one? Be honest with yourself, and do the proper work to become a better boyfriend, cuck, and overall person.

Jay

The answer to the question that all cucks ask me

What kind of cuck do you want? This is the most difficult thing to try to answer. It’s not really something that I can sum up in a paragraph or two. It’s not easy to define and articulate yet I’m constantly having to try to do so. So for those of you who want to know, here’s my best effort:

Like I’ve mentioned on here before, there is a wide spectrum of practices in cuck relationships. All of them involve a sexually unfaithful girlfriend or wife, a totally faithful boyfriend or husband, and a loving and committed long term relationship.

In my mind, each end of the spectrum is a polar opposite and there is everything else in the middle. One end is what I call “hotwifing” (this is only my own definition and other people may see it differently) and the other end is what I would think of as total sexual denial, sexual humiliation, slavery and chastity.

I see hotwifing as a couple who already have a robust sex life together, are each seen as equals in the relationship, and there is very little humiliating kinds of practices such as making him watch or rubbing it in his face afterwards. She is just allowed to sleep with others and he prefers not to. Everything else in the relationship is pretty vanilla.

On the other end, it’s quite different. She controls the relationship and she is always in charge, he is often or always sexually denied and likely put in chastity, emasculated, feminized, while she enjoys all of the sexual partners that she wants, and she they both very much enjoy the humiliating things she would do to him.

As for me, I am somewhere in the middle. I know that hotwifing doesn’t appeal to me and I think it’s because I enjoy the power imbalance of a female led relationship rather than an equal power relationship. I also don’t want a cuckold slave or “sissy” beta kind of guy. That just doesn’t do anything for me at all.

As for sexual denial, I do like denying my cuck to varying degrees. To me, it doesn’t really matter to me if I fuck my cuck or not. I’m always going to be sexually satisfied from other more capable men. Obviously I’m not going to ‘want’ my cuck in the traditional sexual way, however things I would enjoy would be giving him sloppy seconds and rubbing his face all over my pussy after – and he has to be okay with that. It’s doing those things that turns me on, because I like how much it turns him on, but it would turn me off if he asked for it or demanded it.

Just like any other relationship, I need to be physically attracted to my cuck and enjoy spending time with him. It’s not just about cuckolding. I need love and connection; there’s always caring and trust that goes along with that, despite the power imbalance. Although I’m greedy sexually, my cuck is always the most important person in my life and I always want him to be happy as well.

I’ve come to learn that it turns me off when a guy approaches me with his list of wants and needs. I understand why, but it just doesn’t sit well with me. I’ve had conversations with guys who mention the words “I want” and “I need” a hundred times over again and I don’t know why but I hate that. I really don’t care about what you want – I want you to trust that I will do what’s best for both of us and we’ll have the most incredible experiences. If that makes sense…

I have expecations of my cuck (some say those expectations are high – I disagree) and I don’t tolerate any shit behavior from him. I expect him to make quite an effort in pursuing me, dating me, and forever after that.  Some examples of this are saying good morning to me every day (unbelievable how many guys find this difficult…), showing up with a small gift on the first date, anticipating my needs and wants, and doing all of those little things everyday that make me happy (lovely little messages, carrying my bags for me, opening the door for me, paying for things, making me dinner, kissing my toes, gifts for no particular reason…the list goes on). This seems to be a lost art form. I’ve found that a lot of guys are lazy, inconsiderate, and accustomed to getting results without little to no effort. Ladies…don’t put up with this shit -raise the fucking bar already. Guys, please read my post about how to catch a goddess – take notes for fucks sakes.

Well that’s all I can think of right now. I may add to this as I think of things later…

 

*for those of you who noticed, yes I did delete my previous post

Back to beginnings

I’m back after a bit of a break from things and am happy to be writing again here. I lost someone close to me and it has taken a little while to get back on my feet again but I’m pretty much back to my usual self once again. Shit happens in life sometimes!

I’ve thought about a few things the past couple of months while away. One of them being how much I love hearing stories from cucks about that turning point when they first got cucked, or when they first found out that cuckolding was something that turned them on immensely and became a big part of their life. It’s that moment in time that I love to hear them talk about.

I’ve noticed that a common theme is that they were cheated on by their girlfriend when they were younger and at first they didn’t like it but then at some point the feelings of jealousy and insecurity mixed with feeling turned on by it and wanting more. From that point on it was something they struggled to understand why they liked it but there was no denying that they needed it in a relationship.

Most guys I’ve talked to have at that point in their life continued to date vanilla women and hoped that their girlfriend would cheat on them, or some guys were brave enough to outright ask them to. From what I’ve heard most vanilla women say no though.

For my first cuck it was a bit different. He told me that the first time he saw a wife being shared in porn, after that he was hooked on the idea of him being faithful and the woman being a total slut. He also struggled with trying to understand why he wanted that and why he liked that so much but it was definitely something in his life that he wanted and needed to be happy in a relationship.

It’s interesting that for all of them it was an abrupt life changing event and not something that they gradually became interested in. I think that must be why I’m weary of guys who want to date me because they are just curious about cuckolding. I believe that either you’re hardwired to be a cuck or not, and if it’s something you just want to try, it’s likely you are just into it for the erotic fantasy; kind of like role-playing a scenario or something like that.

How did you first know you were meant to be a cuck? Comment below. I’d love to know!

How to catch a goddess 

You want a female centered or female led relationship with a beautiful, powerful, goddess of a woman right? Well let’s say you find one who is incredible and you want to date her. Now what do you need to do to make it happen? Here’s some advice about what you can do to really stand out from the rest and make a great impression from the start so pay attention, make notes, and then get to it!

1. Make an impression immediately 

Give her compliments, tell her you’re serious about your intentions, and ask her what you can do in order to stand out from the rest of the guys pursuing her. Sweep her off her feet right from the first day. 

2. Pay careful attention to her:

Listen carefully to what she says. Pick up on her likes, her dislikes, her preferences, favorite things, birthdays, etc. make getting to know everything about her your most important priority. Learn about what kinds of things or services she needs help with in her life right now. 

3. Be bold:

This is not the time to be passive, even if your nature is to be. Treat this challenge with the same level of intensity, assertiveness, and vigor, as if it was that dream job you are striving for and this is the all important make it or break it interview. Dress your best, smell great, pull out all the shots and be on point all the time. Be creative and driven. This is your one chance so don’t blow it. 

4. Give her what she needs and wants:

This is great advice so listen up… Instead of asking her what you can do for her, learn about what she needs and give it to her. She will be filled with gratitude. Does she hate doing housework? Hire a cleaning company to do it for her once a week. Does she have a sore back from her stressful job? Provide for her financially so she doesn’t have to work then send her to the spa regularly for massages. Is she overwhelmed with looking after the kids? Hire a nanny to help her out. Do not hesitate to do these things for her. Do it today. 

5. Shower her with thoughtful gifts:

Every girl appreciates a surprise gift, goddesses even more so. Send her flowers, her favorite perfume, a gift card for new lingerie, whatever…just send her something you think she might like. If her birthday is coming up then for sure do not forget to send her a gift. Neglecting to do so on her birthday or other special occasion would be inexcusable. 

6. Always follow through with what you say you will do:

Your word must be absolutely solid. If you say you will call her or text her every night before bed then make sure you do it. Every night. Before bed. Every time. Don’t say you will do something and then fail to do it, for whatever reason. If you feel like you might not be able to keep your promise, then tell her before you fuck up. 

7. Make her a priority:

Yes your work is likely stressful and work days are probably long more often than not, but it only takes 10 seconds to send her a text to say something short and sweet. Don’t let long periods go by without reminding her how much she means to you. If you’re thinking about her, tell her. A goddess deserves attention all the time. She wants it. Give it to her. 

8. Adore everything about her:

Love her fiercely, admire her unique qualities, respect her power and authority, and desire her every minute of every day. She is the centre of your universe. 

9. Be dedicated to her happiness:

When she is happy, you are happy therefore you do whatever it takes to ensure that her wants and needs are met. This starts from the moment you meet her and continues, without wavering, throughout. She will forever love you for it. 

10. Be of service to her:

Practice chivalry, hold open the door for her, carry her bags, anticipate when she will need your help with something. Don’t wait for her to ask you for help with something. Pamper her and tend to her needs. Run her errands for her, pour her bath for her, and be useful around the house. 

To love your bull or not.

The most common question I receive from cucks who want to date me is “What kind of cuck relationship do you want?”. It seems like an obvious first question given the wide spectrum of practices and preferences within this type of relationship, and you’d think it would be easy to answer, but I’ve found my answers have changed and evolved as I’ve learned more and more about cuckolding dynamics. I’ve had to examine how I feel about various relationship compositions, roles, and expectations in order to figure out what I like and what I don’t like. Often times as with everything else in this lifestyle, I have to try something in order to see if I feel comfortable with it.

I suspect the most common cuck relationship is where the monogamous husband is sexually denied (sometimes or most of the time) while his non-monogamous wife sleeps with whoever she wants, usually strangers. The wife is not expected to develop feelings for her bulls – it’s simply a sexual experience for her. Usually the cuck is present when she is with her bulls and he may or may not be directly involved in the action in some way. While this kind of relationship is continually exciting, there are safety issues when meeting with only strangers all the time.

Another variation I’ve come across is where the wife has one bull whom she has a romantic relationship with as well as a sexual bond. She has a relationship with her cuck husband as well, but he’s there to give her emotional support, love, comfort, companionship, and financial stability. Often the cuck in this type of relationship wants the bull to live in the same house with them and the wife has the benefit of having two stable, loving, long term relationships.

As a cuckoldress, I have to decide what kind of relationship I want as well as what kind of humiliating things I want to practice on my cuck. With so many options and variations it can be a bit daunting at first to figure it all out.

I have had some experience with both types of cuck relationships and I feel comfortable with both scenarios. The first one is the easiest to maintain as you’re only dealing with a relationship dynamic between the husband and wife. The second scenario can be much more complicated. It starts to grow into a polyamorous type of relationship and with that comes all sorts of challenges. Each person has their own set of individual needs that need to be met on an ongoing basis and insecurities and miscommunication can lead to a breakdown and ultimately a collapse of the relationship. It’s not easy but if done correctly it can be very rewarding.

I get so excited when I hear about cuck couples who are succeeding and thriving with their relationship – whichever composition that might be – and I’d love to hear what has worked for you and why. Let me know! Leave a comment here or on my facebook page or twitter page. Thanks!

 

Venus xo

Diving head first into cuckolding

This is my story of how I got into the cuck lifestyle.

I had been involved in open relationships for several years and I knew that I wanted a non-monogamous relationship with someone however I wanted to have a lot of control over my own sexual freedom. I look back now and realize it was a cuck that I wanted but of course I didn’t know what that really was back then. Anyways back to my story….I was navigating the bland vanilla dating world (sigh) on Tinder, when I matched with this amazing guy who I will call…hmmm what will I call him….how about Ryan. Yes, Ryan.

I began to by telling Ryan how I had no intentions of being monogamous (something I would tell anyone who I considered dating) and he became quite interested in that. Over the next few days and weeks the flurry of exciting and intense conversations we had were all about me learning about his cuckolding fantasies and I admit I was quite wrapped up in it all. The more I learned about it, the more I loved it. I remember him saying “You’re going to get tired of me talking about it.” but actually I never did. I loved talking about it with him, I craved it, it turned me on in a way that I’d never experienced before.

He loved how I wanted to sleep with other men (while he was totally faithful to only me) and he encouraged that side of me. In fact he explained to me that being called a slut is a compliment – something I passionately agree with now. He would be so turned on when I told him about my sexual adventures and when I sent him pictures and videos, and I in turn got turned on by his reactions to it all. That sort of effect we had on each other was what made the relationship so intense, so magical, and so unique; I loved him deeply.

Eventually I made Ryan listen on the phone when I was with a guy. I was a bit nervous about it but obviously excited too. I wanted him to hear how much I loved what I was doing, and what was being done to me. I wanted to hear his voice and for me to whisper things to him. I wanted to tell him I loved him as I was on my knees in front of a huge cock. It was an incredible experience for me and it was all I could think about for the next several days – fucking amazing!

Ryan told me the next day that listening on the phone the night before actually made him trust me even more.  I’ve since heard someone say that “cheating is a betrayal of trust and cuckolding is an exploration of trust” and I would agree with that 100%. Cuckolding only enhanced our foundation of trust between each other and I think this kind of growth is something that a lot of people are unaware happens in these types of relationships.

Eventually things ended between him and I; Ryan’s work schedule took over his life and he no longer had the time needed for this kind of relationship and I had to move on, but I’m so grateful for him introducing me to this whole lifestyle that I’ve since completely immersed myself in. It really was the perfect beginning to this journey into the cuck world!

 

Venus xo